Tears For Enemies: The One Skill The Church Needs Most

“For many, of whom I have often told you and now tell you even with tears, walk as enemies of the cross of Christ.”                                      -Philippians 3:18

Churches that treat people like enemies are missing the point.

Atheists are not our enemies. Homosexuals are not our enemies. Politicians are not our enemies, regardless of party. Muslims are not our enemies. If anything, they are exactly who we are to invest our love and care in.

There are people who don’t believe what you believe, and may never even come close to agreeing with you. There are even people who want to humiliate you for what you believe or prove you wrong if possible. You can call them enemies if you like, but you are never supposed to treat them as such. When Paul wrote to the church in Philippi, he talked about people who were working against him, spreading lies about him, trying to crush his reputation. Paul said that when he thought of those people it broke his heart; that he thought about them with tears. He didn’t ignore or explain away what they were doing. He just chose sorrow instead of anger when he thought of them. If the church is going to impact the world today, we need to become expert at loving people that we disagree with. Love is not an optional part of Christian life, it's mandatory. It’s not easy. It can’t be faked. It won’t be perfect, but it always has to be the goal. People may often combat your arguments, but it’s hard to explain away authentic care. When you trust the truth you know about God, you won’t need to become defensive when someone challenges it. You can hear them out and discuss it if possible, but you don’t have to hate them. You can simply choose to give them what God has given you, patience and love.  

Photo Courtesy of Death To Stock Photo

Why God's Love Matters More Than You Think

We’ve all been told at some point or another that God loves us. We’ve been told in sermons, at conferences, and in songs. It’s a great message, but like most great messages, when you hear it often, it begins to lose it’s meaning. Why is God’s love such a big deal, I mean He loves everyone right? What does God’s love have to do with you and your everyday life?

God’s love isn’t just sentimental feelings of affection for you. God’s love doesn’t mean that He thinks you are great. It means that He values you whether you are acting great or not. His love is not just a fact that you should know in your head. It starts there, but it’s much more.

God’s love is an active, aggressive process. God’s valuing of you means that He wants the best for you. That’s good news for two important reasons; number one, God knows everything, so He actually knows what it best for you. How many times have you made a bad decision or failed at a task simply because you didn’t know enough about it? I’ve done it millions of times. It's impossible to know every possible aspect of every thing. With God, we don't have to.  The second part is also reassuring. God has unlimited power, so He has the ability to help you accomplish what is best for you. Sadly however, while God is good on His side, our side is less than reliable. Our lack of knowledge and lack of power often leads us to battle against God and against what’s best for us. We don’t know and we don’t have as much control as we think we do. That

brings us to a crossroads with two possible answers.

There are only two options in our relationship with God. We either trust God’s love for us even though we don’t understand it and can’t predict it, or we trust ourselves and our efforts. Trusting God, rather than proving yourself to God is the key to life. Rather than seeking to understand or control His love, simply accept it. The song I was taught to sing when I was young wasn’t joking when it taught that God’s love is like “a fountain flowing deep and wide”. Being loved by God is a lot like being carried along a rapidly flowing river. It’s deep so my feet can’t reach the ground and control it. It’s wide, so I can’t reach to the side and escape it. It bruises me, frustrates me, cleans me, and calms me. It’s constantly changing and at the end, I will be in a very different place because of it. 

God loves for you matters very much and it's yours if you will have it.

Why Knowing God Is Better Than Knowing About God

Easter is a reminder that we were created to know God, not just know about God.

Those words are painful for me, because I love to know about stuff. I love attending interesting conferences, listening to new podcasts, and reading good books. I love learning. Every year I try to include some biographies in my reading. The lives of great people are fascinating and often inspiring.  As well written and informative as some biographies can be however, they only help me know about the person.  Reading Jon Meacham’s incredible book on Andrew Jackson, American Lion, doesn’t cause me to know Andrew Jackson. I know more about him, and my life may even be impacted by that knowledge, but I have no relationship with the man, Andrew Jackson.  We live in a society obsessed with knowing about, yet we have a frightening lack of the sort of courage that allows us to attempt authentic relational knowing.

Knowing about God allows me to have more well-informed conversations and teachings. Knowing God causes me to give money to others that I really want to spend on me.

Knowing about God can make you appear intelligent or even holy. Knowing God will often make you appear odd.

Knowing about God is like reading a book on dance or perhaps even taking a dance class, where you practice movements on your own over and over. Knowing God is like a dance on your wedding day. You take your spouse in your arms and slowly you find ways to move together, matching each other stride for stride. Finding a pace and rhythm that’s all your own and differs from everyone else on the dance floor.

Knowing about God can often make us arrogant, judging those who don’t agree with what we know. Knowing God always makes me more humble, loving others with the love of the God I know.

Knowing about God is safe and predicable. Knowing God can lead anywhere, often to places that make me uncomfortable.  The discomfort doesn’t matter though, because God is there as well.  

Knowing about God can lead to heated debates on Facebook and Twitter where we offer jabs and churchy one-liners. Knowing God can lead you to make phone calls and write cards filled with encouragement for people who are hurting. The goal of knowing about God is to be right and point out those who are wrong. The goal of knowing God is to get used to the fact that God loves us even though we are often wrong.

Knowing about God can often lead to knowing God, but it doesn’t always.  Knowing about God without knowing God is worthless.  Our souls crave to be in relationship with God. Our fear demands we know everything about Him first (as if that is remotely possible). When we give in to our fear, we give in to a life of knowing about God from a distance, which will never satisfy us.

I hope this Easter finds you falling more in love with God and less obsessed with facts about Him. 

Why So Many People "Get Saved" And Then Get Gone

The task of speaking about God and His plans for the world has always been a daunting one. As humans, we are not perfect and we do not know everything, yet we must do the best we can to talk about this most important idea. As Christians, the story about God and how it relates to us is the core of how we understand everything in life. So we must talk about God, but we must do it humbly, and we must be honest with ourselves when certain words and phrases that worked well in the past, do not serve us as well today. That brings us to the question of why so many people today seem to “get saved” and then get gone.

The idea of “getting saved” isn’t a phrase that most non-church people are familiar with. Normally it’s presented to them as the idea that God can save you from something: a meaningless life, your own selfishness, or being on fire forever in a place called hell. The thought is that if you follow God you won’t be set on fire forever. So, the speaker is counting on the person’s fear to cause them to choose to follow God. If this is the case then the following is only as strong as the fear. That means that when the fear leaves, the following fades. It’s as if the person is being chased to God all the while having their eyes fixed on what’s behind them that may cause them harm, but as soon as the coast looks clear and they see no danger, they walk away from God. No danger = no need for protection. This causes speakers to try to create fear constantly in the hearts of their listeners. Fear of the world being overrun by evil, fear of death, fear of hell after death, fear of Christianity being swept away by other beliefs. But, here’s where things begin to break down.

No one wants to live in fear every day. Fear is miserable and exhausting, and we can only handle so much of it before we break. (Not the mention the fact that God didn’t create us to live in fear) So, people leave the church and sometimes leave God. They find ways to distract themselves from the constant fear.  And leaders are left scratching their heads wondering what went wrong.

I don’t want to throw stones at anyone, or even begin to try to say that somehow I have better intentions than other people. By and large, I feel most Christian leaders do have good intentions, it’s just that they’ve forgotten how to talk to people. They often see people as a means to an end. They care and they want to reach out, it just tends to come across as manipulation instead of love. As a beginning of a solution I would like to offer up the thought that love is a greater motivator than fear. If someone comes to God because they love Him, then their eyes aren’t fixed on what they may be afraid of that’s behind them, but on the God that they want to know better. Running to God instead of away from hell is about relationship not just self-preservation. That is important, because we were created for relationship, and when we find it, our souls are soothed.

So, I’m not afraid of the rise of Islam, or the dangers to traditional marriage in America, but I do care. I care because I care about the people involved. I’m not afraid, because the God I love (albeit imperfectly) is bigger than those issues.The job he has given me (and I believe all followers of God) is to care for others, especially those unlike ourselves. So don’t be afraid, but love. Love the best you can wherever you can. Love wisely with humility and patience, and trust that God has a firm grasp on all the rest. 

How To Get The Approval You Need Without The Pain You Don't

We all want it. You want it. I want it. No matter how much we try to escape it or explain it away, we all want the approval of others. This isn’t simply a “want” however, it’s a legitimate need. We need a sense of approval in our life to be emotionally healthy. Like all needs, though, it’s easy for us to indulge it in unhealthy ways. We need food. We don’t need a dozen Krispy Kremes, 3 Big Macs, and a gallon of sweet tea. We need time off from work. We don’t need to live in our parent’s basement and have 365 days off a year. Approval isn’t bad, it’s necessary, but it has to be sought out in healthy ways. Here are three ways to make sure your need for approval is met in a healthy way:

First Things First

The first and most important approval that we must be assured of, is the approval of God.  Mercifully, the Bible is jammed full of stories and declarations of God’s approval of you. God’s love for us is described as everlasting, and in a letter to Christians in Rome, a writer says,

"And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from His love. Death can't and life can't. The angels can't and the demons can't. Our fears for today, our worries about tomorrow, and even the powers of hell can't keep God's love away."   -Romans 8:38

God loves you and won’t ever stop. Approving of you and approving of what you do are not the same thing, however. If God loves us then he would never approve of everything we do. You love your child and therefore, you don’t approve of your her sorting through the bottles of cleaner under your sink to drink whatever looks good.   

You’re Next

The second approval that you need for a healthy life is your own. God loves you while knowing everything about you. He owes you nothing. And, He chooses to love you. It that's true,  then you can choose to love yourself as well. You can’t really think that you are more discerning that God do you? You have to stop beating yourself up. You need to quit assuming that you are the most unintelligent,  unattractive, and unimportant person in the room. You matter, God says so. So, learn to trust God on this one, and agree with him about your worth.

Now Others

Only when you know that the God of the Universe loves you, and you have made peace with yourself can you accept the approval of others in a healthy way. When we have accepted God’s love, we don’t have to desperately seek the approval of others to survive. We accept it when it’s there, and we are ok when it’s not. Find healthy people who love you for who you are , not for what you can do for them. When you have found those good friends, invest in them and enjoy them.

Approval is a key component to a healthy life, but seeking it blindly can also create huge messes for us. Know that God loves you today, just as you are, and that the plans He has for you are better than you can imagine.

How To Have Peace In An Unpredictable World

Everything changes.

Our bodies change. Our jobs change. Our friends change. People around us are constantly changing.  Foods that we used to hate as kids, we love now. Our streets look different. Or, how about this gross fact: every 27 days you shed all of your skin and have entirely new skin. Nothing stays the same.

It can be a little dizzying when you think about it. Much of our anxiety comes from the constant unpredictability we live in. How people think of you is constantly changing. What people expect of you is constantly changing. What will the economy be like in 2 years? How will my children do when they are on their own? Will I get sick? Things that seem ok today could change in a moment. There is only one constant in the universe that never truly changes.

God.

This attribute of God is called immutability. It simply means that God never changes, and it’s one of the most comforting bits of theology we have. Here are 3 things that God’s immutability mean for you:

1)You Are Perfectly Loved

You are not loved more when you behave better, at least not by God.  Neither are you ever loved less. God’s love for you is as great today as it was the day you were born. It will never diminish, and since it is perfect, and already at the maximum level possible, it could never increase. You can’t lose it, you don’t have to work to keep it. You are loved, now and forever.

2)You Are Completely Forgiven

Yeah, I know you’ve really messed up. We all have. I know, it’s hard to believe that you could ever be forgiven for that, but you are. God forgives, and doesn’t ever need to revisit it again. If you desire His forgiveness, you will have it. Also, God will not hold on to things to bring up against you later. One Bible writer paints the picture for us by saying that God separates us from our sins as far as east is from west. That means it’s time to stop feeling guilty for things that you have been forgiven for.

3)You Are Never Alone

Few things are as painful as loneliness, which is why it’s so  important to remember that God is with you and God will be with you. He will not change His mind about you. Run as far as you will, but if you desire God’s presence, it is there, a breath away. People may leave you or betray you. People move and people die. But God will never leave your side.

In a constantly changing world, God never changes. He is our port in the storm, and the stability that we need. I pray that these thoughts will bring you peace today!

Photo Courtesy of Death To Stock Photo